The Shame I Felt: A Man’s Encounter with a Female Stalker | Men

Title: Male Stalking Victim Shares Terrifying Ordeal to Shed Light on Underreported Issue

In a harrowing tale of obsession and fear, a man identified only as Tom shared his experience of being stalked by a former colleague turned ex-girlfriend. What started as a tumultuous relationship quickly spiraled into a nightmare of lies, gaslighting, and physical assault.

Tom’s ex-girlfriend began showing up unannounced at places he frequented, leaving him feeling hounded and helpless. Despite trying to set boundaries, the situation only escalated, culminating in a terrifying incident where she chased him through the London underground and sexually assaulted him on a train.

Even after Tom ended the relationship for good, his stalker continued to harass him, showing up at his home and spreading false accusations to his friends. The relentless pursuit left Tom feeling depressed, ashamed, and trapped in a corner with no escape.

Tom’s story sheds light on the often overlooked issue of male stalking victims. While stalking is more commonly associated with female victims, men also experience this crime at alarming rates. According to the Crime Survey of England and Wales, one in 11 men reported being victims of stalking last year.

Despite the prevalence of male stalking victims, conviction rates remain low, with only 1.7% of reported cases resulting in a conviction. The lack of understanding and seriousness surrounding the crime further compounds the challenges faced by victims like Tom.

In response to the growing concern, the government has promised new measures to make it easier to apply for legal restrictions on stalkers’ behavior. Additionally, Labour has pledged to introduce a national stalking action plan and overhaul the police response to better support victims.

Tom’s decision to finally seek help from a helpline and the police highlights the importance of raising awareness about male stalking victims and ensuring they have access to the protection, support, and justice they deserve. As Helen Newlove, the victims’ commissioner for England and Wales, emphasized, all victims, regardless of gender, must be able to seek help and find safety from the pervasive and dangerous crime of stalking.

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